Long-term relationships are rewarding – it’s why so many of us settle down and cohabit or get married, committing to monogamy with someone we love. But I am frequently asked by straight and gay couples and individuals alike how to get the spark back in a relationship because long-term sexual relationships can also be complex and hard work. Most people don’t appreciate the significant impact of millions of years of evolutionary behaviours that are genetically and behaviourally imprinted onto modern humans. Ancient man’s approach to coupling was almost exclusively about reproduction, much like we see in animal species. Males sought out as many females to impregnate as possible, sowing their seed far and wide to father as many offspring as possible and continue their genetic line. On the other hand, females were biologically preoccupied with attracting a selection of males to mate with. Only one male would be the biological father, but all thought they were. Whilst ensuring the best genetic match with one she censured additional protection by tricking the others into thinking they were the fathers. The strong and virile male created the healthiest offspring, the kind nurturing male helped them care for the offspring and the clever intellectual primate male ensured the food and shelter kept them safe. In today’s terms, The goal seeker, the enabler, and the intellectual. Research has proved that early men and women were not sexually monogamous; the prime concern of both was to maximise their reproductive potential and to aid humanity in its survival.
Communication is key
Suppose you’re not happy with the intimate aspect of your relationship and want to know how to get the spark back. In that case, having a serious conversation with your partner is vital to figure out how you both want to move forward and where the boundaries are. You could feel highly frustrated and resentful, thinking that your partner’s libido and desires are no match for yours when they might be thinking the same! (Remember the Pina Colada song?) Some simple measures to spice things up and bring back the focus to intimacy could help, like experimenting with sex toys, light bondage, enjoying erotic material together and sensual massage. All these can help you become reacquainted with each other’s bodies and discover how to get the spark back.
Exploring together
A step further would be to consider my Couples PrivateSensual Massage Class. Perfect for couples who want to get the spark back whilst maintaining their connection and remaining monogamous, you can learn how to pleasure each other better with the help and advice of a seasoned sensual massage expert. For monogamous couples, this workshop is carried out with a ‘Watch and Give’ approach and will help you to connect again. An excellent investment into your health and happiness, you can learn and experience pleasure together in a safe and private environment, with a qualified and supportive expert teaching you everything there is to know about
The teacher/learner dynamic is always professional with clear boundaries, but for those uncomfortable with a massage teacher’s physical involvement, an instructive approach can be used, or couples can attend a massage workshop to watch a live demonstration on a volunteer. However, you may find yourselves getting very involved as your comfort zone expands! In any case, it happens at your own pace. Another alternative is a private, online workshop available for couples who wish to learn remotely in the comfort of their own homes. It also makes it ideal for people who can’t attend my live training in London.
Class Choices
Scroll down the page for more details on each class type.
- The 2 .5 hour Experiential Session – introduction to sensual massage
- The 5-hour Foundation Class – is ideal for expanding your skills to enhance your sexual relationships
- The 10-hour Combined Foundation & Intermediate Class – learning even more skills and becoming a confident lover
When can we take a class?
The Experiential session is 2.5 hours, and the Foundation Interdemate and Professional Classes are held in 5-hour sessions unless arranged differently with mutual agreement
Monday to Friday 5-hour sessions are usually either:-
- 10 am to 3 pm
- 1 pm to 6 pm
- 5 pm to 10 pm
Saturday 5-hour sessions
- 10 am to 3 pm
- Noon to 5 pm
Over what period can we spread the classes?
- Combined Foundation & Intermediate 2 x 5 hours must be completed within six weeks
- Professional Training 4 x 5 hours must be completed within twelve weeks
Frequency of classes
The ten hours classes involve intensive learning and massage practice. Therefore it is important to leave at least three days in between each five-hour class to allow for rest and independent practice sessions.
How soon do we need to book a class?
These classes are popular, and I am also busy with treatment appointments, so I generally run only one five-hour class a day if you have specific dates, it is best to book at least two weeks in advance.
Immediate bookings supplement cost
If you make an enquiry and want to book a class within seven days, an extra 10% charge will be made if I can accommodate you.
Splitting the classes
Can we take the Foundation class and then return later and take the Intermediate or Professional training without repeating the Foundations class?
Yes, The Foundation Class can be followed by a further 5 hours of Intermediate training or 15 hours of Professional training; however, the cost is more being split classes.
Sharing the training with others
All prices are quoted for one couple taking a class. If two couples are taking the course together, 50% is added.